Lyme on the Brain: Part 2 - Hemispheres

Although I REALLY hate Advertisements...(especially those for "luxury items"), I DO have to give props to the person who created this particular advertising campaign...Well Done Sir! : )

"Know Thyself"

            - Socrates 

It's interesting to me how most people don't realize that they are essentially walking around with two very different "personalities" that ultimately work together in such an amazingly integrative and complex way, that they not only end up NOT realizing this, but assume that the patterns of thought and what they essentially care about are simply "who they are", and are completely unaware that their own "individuality" is really the result of an elaborate combination of the two (right and left) brain hemispheres working in a particularly unique and intrinsically harmonic way.

Right Brained Vs. Left Brained

It's safe to say that every person relies more dominantly on either their "right brain" or "left brain", but rarely are they exclusive to only one side. 

Note: The following is a two-part, fun and easy test to help determine not only which side of the brain you are most dominant in, but also, the results will give some insight into what type of "personality" you have from the end results.

Out of all the different methods of determining which side you are most dominant in, this is the easiest way I've ever came across of finding out: Take a quick moment to cross all of your fingers together and notice which thumb (right or left) is on top. To get the most accurate results please do which ever way "feels" most natural to you...Lol - this is NOT a pass or fail test! 

 If your left thumb is on top, then you are pre-dominately "right-brained". And (obviously) if your right thumb is on top, you are predominately "left brained". Write which thumb is on top (Mine is the left thumb), and then continue on to the next part:

 Cross your arms together and notice which arm the right or left is on top. (Mine is the right arm.) If your right arm is on top then it's an indication that you also have "left brain" qualities...and vice versa.


What does all of this mean: Check it out. There are only four possible combinations here and each can tell you a little more about your particular personality.

1) Right Thumb on top (Left Brained), Left arm on top (Right Brained):

• These people like to take care of others, and often display Leader-Type qualities. They innately have keen observation abilities, and are effortlessly able to "see through" situations, being able to discern the root-cause of any problem. They are often quite good at serving as mediators, and are considerate and kind to both conflicting parties. Because of their cool and calm nature, and strong sense of responsibility, they tend to become the "head" of a group and are often popular among people. However, they may not be able to help themselves in becoming involved in the affairs of others, but only because they have a "protective" sense and want to make sure everyone around them is safe and okay. They also can be very concerned about how others view them, and are always on alert.

2) Left Thumb on top (Right Brained), Right arm on top (Left Brained): my personality...

• These people are by nature, considerate, traditional, and often indirect; they dislike conflict, and direct confrontation. They are instinctively able to "read" others, and often adapt their behavior to make those around them as comfortable as possible. Although they are not very good at taking initiatives,  they will always be willing to take a step back to support others. They often have stable personalities, and are very "protective" of the people they love.  Their weakness is that they cannot say no to those in need, and will often put other people's needs in front of their own.

3) Left Thumb on top (Right Brained), Left arm on top (Right Brained):

• The people are very creative, curious, imaginative, free-willed spirits who love to be challenged and are extremely straight-forward in expressing their needs. Once they decided to do something, there is no talking them out of it, and they must do it right away. They are daredevils and often put themselves into dangerous situations (just for the rush) without first thinking it through (sometimes foolishly). Their weakness is that they don't listen to others, and will filter in only what whey want to hear in a conversation. However, because of their straightforward attitude, they tend to be fairly popular.

4) Right Thumb on top (Left Brained), Right arm on top (Left Brained):

• These people are dedicated, cold, perfectionist types who use  logic in all aspects of their life. They are not emotional beings, and the only way to defeat (or win over) them is through reason alone. They have a lot of pride, and a strong impulse to "do the right thing", however, the "right" thing to do is often seen as either "Black or White" to them. There are no grays in their world. If they are your friends, they are extremely trustworthy. However, if they are your opponents, they can be very tough to deal with. Their weakness is that they can be a very 'anal' perfectionist, and as a result, often leave a bad first impression of being hard to deal with.

Interesting game, huh? Of course, I cannot say it is 100% accurate, but I do notice that a LOT of people displaying these type of qualities once completing the game, and usually can even guess which of the four personality types they are before they even try it! (Challenge me - I dare you! Lol...)

You may be asking yourself...How does this relate to Lyme Disease? Well, if you take a look at the following diagram of what the right and left frontal lobes are responsible for, you might just find yourself completely SHOCKED at how (in the Later Stages) pretty much ALL of these abilities seem to be completely stripped and affected by the disease:

Lol - did your lower jaw just drop to the ground when you saw this? - I KNOW mine sure did : )

Sigh, sooo - we already know that through SPECT scans, Lyme patients often display decreased blood flow through specific areas of the brain, but that it is not a diagnostic tool, since other illness (particularly auto-immune) like Lupus and MS can also display the same features. 

However, what really GETS to me, is that at NO point in my illness, even when I was showing the onset of severe dementia, and mimicking aspects of parkinson's and ALS, besides a "decreased signal to my right ventricle, and some scarring"... my MRI tests (which show brain structure, not function) ALWAYS came back relatively normal. The question I pose is this: How can that possibly be?

I can't help but think of only one reason why this is...and, of course, it will greatly challenge the beliefs of Western Medicine. So, please tune in on my NEXT post where I will attempt to connect another very important, but highly unrecognized part of the Central Nervous System and its affects on the brain. For those of you who haven't guessed already, the "part" I'm referring to is the Craniosacral System.

Many Blessings,

Sarah 

Sensory Overload and the Origins of The Gratitude Gallery

The Universe is full of surprises - it often takes you down roads you never imagined traveling, and for me, painting has been one of them. What I now call "The Gratitude Gallery" had a very unexpected and unintended beginning that I'd like to tell you about...

In early March of this year, I decided to attend a Reiki workshop in NYC for the weekend and needed a place to crash for the duration of it. Luckily, a dear friend of mine from high school lived only 5 blocks away from where the class was being held, and agreed to take me in.

Now, before I tell you about the origins of my Gratitude Gallery, I'd like mention that any Lymie who experiences "sensory overload" as an unfortunate neurological symptom of Late Stage Lyme Disease will tell you that staying in a city (especially New York!) is NOT exactly an ideal circumstance to be in. Here's why:

You see, most people are completely unaware and therefore cannot appreciate just how magnificent the brain is, particularly in its ability to filter out unimportant information about the environment you are in at any given second. 

It's all quite easy to understand if you imagine the brain as a very efficient, highly intelligent computer that is able to take all of the millions upon millions of GB's of data that is thrown its way every single moment of the day, and automatically (effortlessly even) determine what part of that information is important for you to be consciously aware of, and what part just isn't. It is only because of this ability that you are able to concentrate and focus on any task you ever attempt to perform - pretty cool, right?...

Now. Imagine that something gets into that computer and decides to turn that data-filtering mechanism OFF. You would now find yourself completely paralyzed and overwhelmed by your surroundings, being constantly bombarded by information that is simply too much for your brain-computer to process. This is Sensory Overload.

When this happens a couple of key self-preserving cautionary steps are taken by your loving brain in a vain attempt to prevent a total "system meltdown". First, you may start to feel a "tightening" pressure that pulls down from the inside of your head and spine. In medical terms it feels like your dura-mater and meninges start to constrict, tighten and twist inward...um - this is painful. 


Immediately following that, (or maybe even as a result of that) your brain will try to limit the amount of data being thrown at it by literally constricting your consciousness and therefore, your ability to be aware of (to "tune" into and process) anything that is beyond a ten-inch radius from where you stand. You simply WILL NOT be able to integrate anything else into your surroundings. I once heard someone describe this by saying, "I feel like the world literally ends 10 inches from my face". 

I used to try and describe it to people by saying that everything has become "theoretical" or "intangible". For example, let's take something that can only be theoretical in our minds and use it as a metaphor: The Milky Way Galaxy (What a marvelous creation!). 


Why can we perceive this very real thing only in theory? For a lot of reasons: because we don't need to integrate it into our surroundings to survive, because the enormity of it is simply not tangible; it's not something we can literally experience, touch and comprehend with our minds (lol - it's OUT THERE...). 

Now, what would you say if I told you I had that same feeling when looking at a chair that was five feet from me? - This is the best way I know how to relay to you what a constriction in consciousness from sensory overload does to my level of awareness.

Note: If this is happening to you please kindly turn around and go back home, you are not going to be able to come out and play today : ) 

Okay, so red alarms are going off in your head, something is definitely WRONG, but you don't heed my advice and go rest, you persevere and attempt battle through it. Unfortunately, I've made this incredibly stupid mistake on numerous occasions and therefore can tell you exactly what the next step in this grueling process will be: your computer-brain will start to short circuit. Ah...and this is where all the fun really begins...

When I imagine a real computer short-circuiting, images of sputtering sparks from melting electrical wires and circuits flying everywhere enter my mind, and ironically, this is not very far off to what actually happens to your body. 

You may start to stutter, become confused, disorientated, not understand where you are or where you need to go, your movements may become awkward, jolting, and stiff, your limbs may jerk or tremor, you might start convulsing or become paralyzed, your hands might curl inwards and become stuck like that, or - you might even start to seize... 

Since 2007 I have experienced this bewildering aspect of Neuro-Lyme (to varying degrees); needless to say - I've learned it's simply easier to not venture out too much.  

Okay! - back to my story. Because of this neurological condition of mine, during that weekend in NYC with my friend, Charles, I would go to class, practically run back to his apartment, sleep for a couple of hours and then have absolutely nothing to do for the next five hours. Charles is never in his apartment - he is always working, sometimes coming home way after midnight - so I had a LOT of alone time. 

When I first got there I remember him telling me three things: make yourself at home (thanks luv :), I work very late hours, and why don't you try and paint if you can? (he did have all the supplies)...

Having NEVER painted before, one night I decided to give it a try. Of course I was awkward and clumsy and wasted too much paint, but I LOVED it! How relaxing, how rewarding, how forgiving it was - if I didn't like what I just did, I could just paint over it! 
So I ended up with a small abstract blast of colors and swirls that I felt extremely satisfied with and overly proud of. So proud, in fact, that I simply had to put it up on facebook for display. I had accomplished something, CREATED something, and wanted to share. That - I thought would be the end of it.

A couple days later I received a message from a beloved Uncle of mine in Switzerland who asked me if I would be willing to try and paint a particular song for him that has haunted him for years. I totally understood what he meant - music evokes so much emotion, but emotions are blind and can only be felt... he wanted to actually see what he was feeling. I was totally game for it, downloaded the song, got my supplies and went to work. 

In the end, I think he felt deeply moved by what I had created, and thought that I should continue painting. As a "thank you" he sent me enough canvases, supplies, paints, and brushes that I was convinced could last a me lifetime.


At the same time I received these supplies, I was also selling a bunch of stuff on e-bay that some friends and family had sent me to help pay for my ongoing medical expenses. My disability was and still is in the processing phase, and I had been so desperate and in despair - not knowing how I could come up with the money I needed to continue my treatment, that I couldn't help but feel overcome with gratitude towards the people who cared enough to send me things to sell. I kept thinking to myself how can I repay such wonderful acts of kindness?? 


Turns out the answer was right in front of me, all around my room in fact. I ended up repaying them with paintings - paintings that were unique to them, that held their essence, and my gratitude. I wanted them to be able to look at it everyday and know that what they had done had saved me, I wanted them to look at it and remember that that kind of kindness could never be forgotten. 
   
Sarah